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The Inside Corner

Essays on damn near everything

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16 October 1956
I was born of normal parentage and raised in the wilds of Akron, Ohio. I majored in virginity loss at Wittenberg University and flunked out. I later earned an honors degree from Wright State University. I studied international relations in graduate school but ended up becoming an electrician. This gave me superior tool skills and the ressurection of my home, Re-Biltmore made me very handy. My cats made me excellent furniture.
So I while away my lonely nights trying to write, bent over a book, my stereo chugging away unless i'm at the race track waving a flag at race car drivers who don't care about such things as "Is the track clear ahead of me?" Even raced myself a bit, and will again, if only you rich Nigerians will finally transfer me the money your so sincerely promised.
I am a trifle political, and a liberal, which is really the only choice today for a thinking man. I abandoned my secular life to join a church but that hasn't made me anti-choice or a supporter of (UN)Intelligent design, or any other gross hallucinations. I remain defiantly single thanks to the women of the world who are of one mind about me.

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